Thursday, July 1, 2010

Pre-Marital Counseling - Part 3

Topic - The Role of the Husband and Wife

This week Lee and I both took away so much from the class. They split the class up so that the Men were in another room listening to a male speaker and the Women stayed and listened to a female speaker. The speakers are a married couple that have 5 children, whew. Again, they were wonderfully spoken and got their message across seamlessly.

The Role of the Wife is to be the 'helpful servant' and although it sounds like you are supposed to be weak and do what your husband tells you to do, that isn't the case at all. It means that no matter what is going on, be helpful to your husband, respect him, love him and serve him. One of the points my speaker made is that after 5 kids she doesn't have alot of attention to give to her husband at the end of the day. She went back to this alot and spoke about failing at this. There must always be time for your husband, if you have spent your energy on something else and don't have any when he gets home from work, then you haven't spent your energy well. She also said that, logically, there are 2 things that feed a man: hunger and sex. Learn what he likes to eat, and learn his appetite in the bedroom. If we withhold love or sex, then we have failed. And it is easy to justify withholding love when it feels like he isn't paying attention enough or has said something hurtful, but you shouldn't withhold love when you have the ability to give it. One last thing she said is this: men have the emotional capacity of a small red wagon and women have the emotional capacity of a 2 ton truck. This is true, especially when you want to talk it out for a reallllllly looong time and the men have checked out. They don't have the emotional capacity that we do so keeping it to a 'short account' is best if possible.

I have learned and grown already in the 3 classes that we have taken. I am watching Lee do the same thing. Invaluable knowledge and foundation of expectations..........

Next class is spiritual intimacy. Thanks for reading.

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